the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
handjob tips. give me some.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Randomize
