Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Randomize
