There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
