"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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