You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Randomize