You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
