No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize