i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
