ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
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