I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
