Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
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