Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
