Whoa Z and x make the same sound
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
