in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Randomize
