Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Randomize
