I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
