That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
