It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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