People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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