turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
This baby is an asshole
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
