omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize
