forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Randomize
