Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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