Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
it was like eating out sand paper
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Randomize
