Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
me + whiskey = a bad person
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
