he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
