Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
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