Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
i think i just lost a toe
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
