i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
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