Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Randomize
