you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
