Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
I just gift wrapped bread.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
