Well douche your snatch and let's go!
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I just had sex on a roof
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Randomize
