plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
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