dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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