i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Randomize
