i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
