How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
It's shark week go big or go home
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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