it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account
damn...impressive bar tab
no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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