I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
jump out the window naked night went bad
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