oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
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