rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Randomize