where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Brb crying the tears of my youth
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
i think im in europe. pls send help
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
