Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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