This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
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