Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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