I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
im about as happy as oj after his trial
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
you never un-have a 4some
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
