FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Randomize