I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Randomize
