hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I understand Curling. That high.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Randomize
